Chapter 2 ~ Not Even Living, I Was Just Numb…
The next day was the day of the funeral. I felt like a zombie, totally numb, I was there but only in body. I watched the whole thing. I couldn’t even cry anymore, I just stood there swaying a little.
He was being buried in the woods next to our special spot. A place we used to go together to talk. The very spot that I had almost told him many times that I loved him. It was his favorite spot to go in the woods.
Everyone just kept glancing at me. Billy came over to me and asked if I wanted to say anything. I just looked at him with this blank look on my face. He walked away with a tears in his eyes. I looked down and I didn’t even know what I was wearing. Who had dressed me? I was wearing a little black strapless sundress. With black sandals. My thoughts were so chaotic.
I so wanted to jump in that hole with him and let them cover me up too. As soon as I thought that my dad ran to my side. I actually had taken a step in that direction.
He grabbed my shoulders and I started crying again. I screamed a wordless screams, it was the loudest scream I had ever heard hurting my ears and I fell to the ground. My mom ran over and held me while I sat there crying and rocking back and forth again. I shoved her arms off of me and got up off the ground. I took a look at everyone around me and I took off, because the only arms I wanted was Jakes and I would never feel them around me again.
No more hugs, no more smiles, no more anything! His life was over! I felt like mine was too. I didn’t want to be without him. I ran to the cliffs, that my mom and Jake used to go to.
I had heard the story a million times about the stupid things my mom did when my dad left her. I didn’t know how she could have done those things, but now I knew exactly what she was feeling. I got up to the top and looked down. I stood there for several hours. I heard them calling to me trying to get me to answer them. They were calling my name over and over.
I looked down again and I heard a voice. I didn’t listen to it. I didn’t care about anything anymore. I just wanted to be with my Jake. So I took a step into the open air…and fell!
I didn’t even scream….Then I hit the water. I didn’t even try to swim, I just went down. Then all of the sudden someone was pulling me up and out onto sand. I really don’t remember anything else. The next thing I knew I was at home waking up the next morning.
When I did wake up I just laid there not moving. I just starred at the ceiling. My heart was aching, it was like there was a giant hole there, it was empty. Why did someone save me? Again my dad came to my side.
“Because we love you Nessie. We can’t live without you, You will never do that again.” He told me. I just starred at him. I wanted to tell him sorry, but I couldn’t. I wanted Jake. No one else. He heard me think this and he looked at me and put his head down and walked out.
What was I going to do? I thought over and over. I grabbed the letter and ring off of my table next to my bed and I read the letter over again and grabbed the ring out of the black satin box and put it on. It fit perfect.
I told myself I would never take it off again as long as I lived. Which would be forever, a painful forever with out my Jake.
I feel back to sleep but only for a few minutes. Long enough to dream. I dreamed that Jake and I were out hunting this time alone. Then we saw a hunter Jake yelled at me to run. He screamed I LOVE YOU!! PLEASE RUN!! So I ran I thought he was right behind me. But when I looked back he was gone.
I ran back and he was….he was just gone and so was the hunter. I kept running and looking for him but he wasn’t there. I woke up screaming. My mom came in and tried to sooth me, but I couldn’t stop crying. She didn’t know what to do. My dad called my grandpa and he ran down with his bag.
I just couldn’t stop yelling and crying. I ended up punching my dad in the face and hitting my grandpa too. They called Jasper and Emmett to come and hold me down then my grandpa sedated me. I fell asleep hearing my dad comforting my mom.
This went on like this for about a month and then something changed. I woke up and everyone was in my living room. My grandpa Carlisle, grandma Esme, Emmett, Rose, Alice, Jasper, my mom and dad.
They were talking about me. They thought I was asleep. I just kept listening. They were talking about what to do about me, how to help me get better. Then my dad mentioned leaving. I screamed and ran out of the room.
“I am not moving away from him! I am not leaving him, I can‘t leave him. Don‘t you all see. I can‘t live with out him, I will never get better.”
Everyone just stared at me. I couldn’t take it, I stared everyone back in the eye for a few moments and then I just ran again. It seemed to me that was all I had been doing lately. It was like I was running from everything, including my life. This time I ran to where Jake was buried. I needed to talk to him and him alone. I needed to feel like apart of him was near. I fell to the ground next to him.
“ Jakey, I need you. I need you now! You know what you promised me something when I was little. You promised me you would always be here for me no matter what. You broke your promise!” I started screaming at him at the top of my lungs and hitting the ground where he was laid to rest. “ How dare you leave me. Why, why.
I hate you! Do you hear me, I hate you!” Then I started crying again. I laid down right there with him. “ I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I said that. I love you! Do you hear me please? I take it back…I love you. I just want you back. I can’t live without you! Please come back to me. Please! I‘ll do anything, anything to have you back.”
I didn’t hear anything. But when I turned around Seth and Quil was standing there in their wolf forms. I ran to Quil and he didn’t know how to comfort me in that form so he pulled me away and went to phase. When he came back he pulled me into his arms and held me for the rest of the night. Just sitting on the ground with his arms around me. It was almost like Jake was holding me. Almost, nobody could hold me like my Jakey!
“Quil, What do I do? They want me to leave. I can’t do it. I won’t leave him.”
“ Maybe it would be better for you.” Quil said.
I pulled away from him and looked him straight in the face. Then I looked at Seth.
“ Do you all want me to leave?” I asked them. They wouldn’t answer.
“ Do you?”
“ Of course we don’t Ness. But we need to find a way to help you get better. Your not getting better, and were all scared for you. We‘re scared your going to do something to yourself. There is a story about how a imprint got hurt and the wolf ended up killing himself because of it. We don‘t want you to do something like that.” Seth said.
“ What will you all do now? Whose in charge of the pack?” I asked I didn’t want to talk about leaving anymore!
“ We are all going back to Sam’s Pack.” Is all they said. I just let it go. Jacob wouldn’t have liked that. Actually he would have been yelling at them for that.
I pulled myself away from them and told them goodnight. I walked at slow human pace down to the beach. I just wanted to be alone. It didn’t last to long. My mom and dad showed up about twenty minutes after I showed up there. I was staring out at the ocean when they came up behind me, wrapping their arms around me.
“ Renesmee, honey were sorry you over heard that. We aren’t sure what we are doing yet. We want you to be okay. And right now your not.” My mom said. “Honey, I know how you feel. I lost my best friend too. I know how it feels to loose the one you love! Please just talk to me.”
“ Mom, I just want to go home, Please.” I whispered to her.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
For the next several months I tried to act like I was getting better, so we wouldn’t move, but I really wasn’t. I had that nightmare every night. It was the same one I had the night he died, but I was in it. When I got to where Jake had been he was gone and I just kept running feeling so alone. I woke up screaming every night. I was still so numb inside. I didn’t hunt anymore. I wasn’t really there. After about three months my mom came into my room one night after the nightmare woke me.
“Honey, are you okay?” She asked me brushing my tears away. I just looked at her crying and curled up into a ball. “ Nessie, were leaving. We know you don’t want to, but I think it’s what’s best for you. Honey he’s not coming back. You know that don’t you? He can’t come back to you. If he could he would already have done it. He loved you so much.” She paused because I had looked down at my ring when she said loved. In the past tense, like he didn’t love me anymore. “He wouldn’t have wanted you to be like this. He would have wanted you to live your life happy not sad all the time, not because of him. We will be leaving the day after tomorrow. So tomorrow everyone is coming over to say goodbye. You need to be up and dressed.” Then she kissed my forehead and walked out of my room.
I just wailed. I didn’t want to leave! I had to many memories with him here. I needed them, it was the only thing keeping me going. I was dead inside. If I didn’t have the memories of him and the place where he was actually, I didn’t think I could live. I wish it had been me that was killed and not him. Why Jake? It’s just not fair.
The next morning I woke up to aunt Alice in my room packing my things up. She looked at me and smiled timidly. For once in my whole life she didn’t tell me what to wear. I pulled out a black t-shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. I pulled my hair up into a pony tail. I didn’t really care what I looked like. It didn’t matter anymore.
I didn’t need to impress anyone any more so what was the use. I sat on my bed for a minute then went out into the living room. Everyone was already there. Everyone turned to look at me. Billy came over and hugged me. I started bawling.
He reminded me of Jake the most, I didn’t want to say goodbye to them. What was the use, I had to so I did it. When I had hugged everyone one time and had told everyone goodbye. I knew there was one person more important than any, that I also had to tell goodbye.
So while no one was looking I snuck out the back door and ran into the woods. I made it to where I wanted to be in seconds. I just stood there for a minute then I walked over to where he was and sat down, just listening, crying softly.
“Jakey, I have to tell you goodbye. They’re making me leave. I don’t even know where were going. God! I miss you. It’s not fair!. You missed my birthday. It really wasn’t anything special they tried, but I walked out. All I wanted was you to be there and you weren’t so it sucked. I got a car, I haven’t even seen it or touched it. It’s a Porsche. I don’t even care, where am I going to go without you?”
I sat there for a minute and a big mountain lion stalked by. I just sat there. There was only one person who could ever get me to hunt when I didn’t want to and he was gone now. “Did you know your pack went back to Sam? I think that’s stupid of them. Jake I don’t want to leave you, but they won’t listen to me. You know what my mom said to me last night. She actually asked me if I knew you weren’t coming back. Of course I know that. I wish you could, but I can’t let you go. Jake what do I do with out you? I keep asking everyone that, but no one will answer me. I need you!” I paused hearing my mom yell for me. “I have to go. I love you Jakey! I always will I promise you that. Never forget that, you hear me. I’ll never forget you. I love you Jacob Black till the day I die. I will love you forever! I love my ring, it will never leave my hand. Goodbye my Jacob Black.” I got up to walk away and felt like he might have actually heard me. I thought I heard him say ‘please be happy my beautiful Nessie. I love you forever!’ I walked home at human pace crying. I ran right into my uncle Jasper.
“ Hey sweetie. You okay?” He asked me
“ Sure uncle Jasper, I’m great! I just said goodbye to the love of my life, that is buried in the ground. But other than that I’m fine!” I said sarcastically. I was tired of just letting every thing just go by me. He tried to sooth me with his power, but I reached up and put my hand on his face. I showed him my whole conversation with Jake. I asked him how he would feel if it were Alice. He couldn’t answer me. He just stared at me. So I walked away. I couldn’t stand everyone staring at me anymore. Instead of crying now and upset, I was angry. I was angry with every one and every thing. I went straight to my room and laid on my bed staring at my ceiling. I got to thinking about who I was now. I thought I’ll never be that loving Nessie ever again! I got out of bed and walked out into the living room and my dad looked up at me.
“ Dad, from now on I don’t want anyone to call me Nessie. My name is Renesmee. I never want to hear it again.” I told him, but I looked at everyone because they were all still there. Then I walked back to my room slamming my door. I was not the same person anymore. I was not Jake’s Nessie. I was just Renesmee. That’s all.
I feel asleep pretty fast that night with a different dream. I dreamed of telling Jacob good bye. I woke up crying, but I didn’t scream. For the rest of the night I just laid there. In the morning I got up, got dressed in a black spaghetti strap dress. I didn’t want to wear any other color. I was still in mourning. Alice came in to try to dress me and I was already done. She frowned at me. I didn’t care anymore what she wanted , I didn‘t care what anyone wanted anymore.
Before I never wanted to hurt her feelings. Now I didn’t care whose feeling I hurt. As I said, I wasn’t the same person. I wasn’t happy anymore. I honestly didn’t think I would ever be happy again. What was the use of being happy when everything there was to be happy about was in the ground in forks and I wouldn’t be anymore. I was leaving happiness behind me and I wasn’t picking it back up. I would always be the angry shell of the once happy Nessie.
I just left her in my room with that little pout on her face. I had chosen not to speak anymore. I would only use my power. I decided this last night while I stared at my ceiling. I was done being what they all wanted me to be.
I walked out into the living room and just looked at everyone. I didn’t smile and I just thought. Dad, how do I get to where we are going? He looked at me like ‘why didn’t you just say that out loud‘. My mom didn’t know what to do. I just sat there and waited.
He didn’t answer me so I walked over to my mom and replayed what I had asked dad, I used my gift this time. She looked at my dad then she looked at me. She picked up a piece of paper wrote the directions on it and then handed it to me. I took it, grabbing my purse and my keys, then got in my new car that I had never even looked at let alone drove, pulled out and left my favorite place in the world.
When I was near the place were Jake was left I whispered to him. “I love you my Jakey. Say goodbye to your Nessie. She doesn’t exist anymore, they took her away when they put you were you are and they made me leave you. But she still loves you and she always will. Goodbye my love, my life, my world, and my best friend. It’s all over for your Nessie now. I’m just Renessmee Cullen from now on.”
He was being buried in the woods next to our special spot. A place we used to go together to talk. The very spot that I had almost told him many times that I loved him. It was his favorite spot to go in the woods.
Everyone just kept glancing at me. Billy came over to me and asked if I wanted to say anything. I just looked at him with this blank look on my face. He walked away with a tears in his eyes. I looked down and I didn’t even know what I was wearing. Who had dressed me? I was wearing a little black strapless sundress. With black sandals. My thoughts were so chaotic.
I so wanted to jump in that hole with him and let them cover me up too. As soon as I thought that my dad ran to my side. I actually had taken a step in that direction.
He grabbed my shoulders and I started crying again. I screamed a wordless screams, it was the loudest scream I had ever heard hurting my ears and I fell to the ground. My mom ran over and held me while I sat there crying and rocking back and forth again. I shoved her arms off of me and got up off the ground. I took a look at everyone around me and I took off, because the only arms I wanted was Jakes and I would never feel them around me again.
No more hugs, no more smiles, no more anything! His life was over! I felt like mine was too. I didn’t want to be without him. I ran to the cliffs, that my mom and Jake used to go to.
I had heard the story a million times about the stupid things my mom did when my dad left her. I didn’t know how she could have done those things, but now I knew exactly what she was feeling. I got up to the top and looked down. I stood there for several hours. I heard them calling to me trying to get me to answer them. They were calling my name over and over.
I looked down again and I heard a voice. I didn’t listen to it. I didn’t care about anything anymore. I just wanted to be with my Jake. So I took a step into the open air…and fell!
I didn’t even scream….Then I hit the water. I didn’t even try to swim, I just went down. Then all of the sudden someone was pulling me up and out onto sand. I really don’t remember anything else. The next thing I knew I was at home waking up the next morning.
When I did wake up I just laid there not moving. I just starred at the ceiling. My heart was aching, it was like there was a giant hole there, it was empty. Why did someone save me? Again my dad came to my side.
“Because we love you Nessie. We can’t live without you, You will never do that again.” He told me. I just starred at him. I wanted to tell him sorry, but I couldn’t. I wanted Jake. No one else. He heard me think this and he looked at me and put his head down and walked out.
What was I going to do? I thought over and over. I grabbed the letter and ring off of my table next to my bed and I read the letter over again and grabbed the ring out of the black satin box and put it on. It fit perfect.
I told myself I would never take it off again as long as I lived. Which would be forever, a painful forever with out my Jake.
I feel back to sleep but only for a few minutes. Long enough to dream. I dreamed that Jake and I were out hunting this time alone. Then we saw a hunter Jake yelled at me to run. He screamed I LOVE YOU!! PLEASE RUN!! So I ran I thought he was right behind me. But when I looked back he was gone.
I ran back and he was….he was just gone and so was the hunter. I kept running and looking for him but he wasn’t there. I woke up screaming. My mom came in and tried to sooth me, but I couldn’t stop crying. She didn’t know what to do. My dad called my grandpa and he ran down with his bag.
I just couldn’t stop yelling and crying. I ended up punching my dad in the face and hitting my grandpa too. They called Jasper and Emmett to come and hold me down then my grandpa sedated me. I fell asleep hearing my dad comforting my mom.
This went on like this for about a month and then something changed. I woke up and everyone was in my living room. My grandpa Carlisle, grandma Esme, Emmett, Rose, Alice, Jasper, my mom and dad.
They were talking about me. They thought I was asleep. I just kept listening. They were talking about what to do about me, how to help me get better. Then my dad mentioned leaving. I screamed and ran out of the room.
“I am not moving away from him! I am not leaving him, I can‘t leave him. Don‘t you all see. I can‘t live with out him, I will never get better.”
Everyone just stared at me. I couldn’t take it, I stared everyone back in the eye for a few moments and then I just ran again. It seemed to me that was all I had been doing lately. It was like I was running from everything, including my life. This time I ran to where Jake was buried. I needed to talk to him and him alone. I needed to feel like apart of him was near. I fell to the ground next to him.
“ Jakey, I need you. I need you now! You know what you promised me something when I was little. You promised me you would always be here for me no matter what. You broke your promise!” I started screaming at him at the top of my lungs and hitting the ground where he was laid to rest. “ How dare you leave me. Why, why.
I hate you! Do you hear me, I hate you!” Then I started crying again. I laid down right there with him. “ I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I said that. I love you! Do you hear me please? I take it back…I love you. I just want you back. I can’t live without you! Please come back to me. Please! I‘ll do anything, anything to have you back.”
I didn’t hear anything. But when I turned around Seth and Quil was standing there in their wolf forms. I ran to Quil and he didn’t know how to comfort me in that form so he pulled me away and went to phase. When he came back he pulled me into his arms and held me for the rest of the night. Just sitting on the ground with his arms around me. It was almost like Jake was holding me. Almost, nobody could hold me like my Jakey!
“Quil, What do I do? They want me to leave. I can’t do it. I won’t leave him.”
“ Maybe it would be better for you.” Quil said.
I pulled away from him and looked him straight in the face. Then I looked at Seth.
“ Do you all want me to leave?” I asked them. They wouldn’t answer.
“ Do you?”
“ Of course we don’t Ness. But we need to find a way to help you get better. Your not getting better, and were all scared for you. We‘re scared your going to do something to yourself. There is a story about how a imprint got hurt and the wolf ended up killing himself because of it. We don‘t want you to do something like that.” Seth said.
“ What will you all do now? Whose in charge of the pack?” I asked I didn’t want to talk about leaving anymore!
“ We are all going back to Sam’s Pack.” Is all they said. I just let it go. Jacob wouldn’t have liked that. Actually he would have been yelling at them for that.
I pulled myself away from them and told them goodnight. I walked at slow human pace down to the beach. I just wanted to be alone. It didn’t last to long. My mom and dad showed up about twenty minutes after I showed up there. I was staring out at the ocean when they came up behind me, wrapping their arms around me.
“ Renesmee, honey were sorry you over heard that. We aren’t sure what we are doing yet. We want you to be okay. And right now your not.” My mom said. “Honey, I know how you feel. I lost my best friend too. I know how it feels to loose the one you love! Please just talk to me.”
“ Mom, I just want to go home, Please.” I whispered to her.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
For the next several months I tried to act like I was getting better, so we wouldn’t move, but I really wasn’t. I had that nightmare every night. It was the same one I had the night he died, but I was in it. When I got to where Jake had been he was gone and I just kept running feeling so alone. I woke up screaming every night. I was still so numb inside. I didn’t hunt anymore. I wasn’t really there. After about three months my mom came into my room one night after the nightmare woke me.
“Honey, are you okay?” She asked me brushing my tears away. I just looked at her crying and curled up into a ball. “ Nessie, were leaving. We know you don’t want to, but I think it’s what’s best for you. Honey he’s not coming back. You know that don’t you? He can’t come back to you. If he could he would already have done it. He loved you so much.” She paused because I had looked down at my ring when she said loved. In the past tense, like he didn’t love me anymore. “He wouldn’t have wanted you to be like this. He would have wanted you to live your life happy not sad all the time, not because of him. We will be leaving the day after tomorrow. So tomorrow everyone is coming over to say goodbye. You need to be up and dressed.” Then she kissed my forehead and walked out of my room.
I just wailed. I didn’t want to leave! I had to many memories with him here. I needed them, it was the only thing keeping me going. I was dead inside. If I didn’t have the memories of him and the place where he was actually, I didn’t think I could live. I wish it had been me that was killed and not him. Why Jake? It’s just not fair.
The next morning I woke up to aunt Alice in my room packing my things up. She looked at me and smiled timidly. For once in my whole life she didn’t tell me what to wear. I pulled out a black t-shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. I pulled my hair up into a pony tail. I didn’t really care what I looked like. It didn’t matter anymore.
I didn’t need to impress anyone any more so what was the use. I sat on my bed for a minute then went out into the living room. Everyone was already there. Everyone turned to look at me. Billy came over and hugged me. I started bawling.
He reminded me of Jake the most, I didn’t want to say goodbye to them. What was the use, I had to so I did it. When I had hugged everyone one time and had told everyone goodbye. I knew there was one person more important than any, that I also had to tell goodbye.
So while no one was looking I snuck out the back door and ran into the woods. I made it to where I wanted to be in seconds. I just stood there for a minute then I walked over to where he was and sat down, just listening, crying softly.
“Jakey, I have to tell you goodbye. They’re making me leave. I don’t even know where were going. God! I miss you. It’s not fair!. You missed my birthday. It really wasn’t anything special they tried, but I walked out. All I wanted was you to be there and you weren’t so it sucked. I got a car, I haven’t even seen it or touched it. It’s a Porsche. I don’t even care, where am I going to go without you?”
I sat there for a minute and a big mountain lion stalked by. I just sat there. There was only one person who could ever get me to hunt when I didn’t want to and he was gone now. “Did you know your pack went back to Sam? I think that’s stupid of them. Jake I don’t want to leave you, but they won’t listen to me. You know what my mom said to me last night. She actually asked me if I knew you weren’t coming back. Of course I know that. I wish you could, but I can’t let you go. Jake what do I do with out you? I keep asking everyone that, but no one will answer me. I need you!” I paused hearing my mom yell for me. “I have to go. I love you Jakey! I always will I promise you that. Never forget that, you hear me. I’ll never forget you. I love you Jacob Black till the day I die. I will love you forever! I love my ring, it will never leave my hand. Goodbye my Jacob Black.” I got up to walk away and felt like he might have actually heard me. I thought I heard him say ‘please be happy my beautiful Nessie. I love you forever!’ I walked home at human pace crying. I ran right into my uncle Jasper.
“ Hey sweetie. You okay?” He asked me
“ Sure uncle Jasper, I’m great! I just said goodbye to the love of my life, that is buried in the ground. But other than that I’m fine!” I said sarcastically. I was tired of just letting every thing just go by me. He tried to sooth me with his power, but I reached up and put my hand on his face. I showed him my whole conversation with Jake. I asked him how he would feel if it were Alice. He couldn’t answer me. He just stared at me. So I walked away. I couldn’t stand everyone staring at me anymore. Instead of crying now and upset, I was angry. I was angry with every one and every thing. I went straight to my room and laid on my bed staring at my ceiling. I got to thinking about who I was now. I thought I’ll never be that loving Nessie ever again! I got out of bed and walked out into the living room and my dad looked up at me.
“ Dad, from now on I don’t want anyone to call me Nessie. My name is Renesmee. I never want to hear it again.” I told him, but I looked at everyone because they were all still there. Then I walked back to my room slamming my door. I was not the same person anymore. I was not Jake’s Nessie. I was just Renesmee. That’s all.
I feel asleep pretty fast that night with a different dream. I dreamed of telling Jacob good bye. I woke up crying, but I didn’t scream. For the rest of the night I just laid there. In the morning I got up, got dressed in a black spaghetti strap dress. I didn’t want to wear any other color. I was still in mourning. Alice came in to try to dress me and I was already done. She frowned at me. I didn’t care anymore what she wanted , I didn‘t care what anyone wanted anymore.
Before I never wanted to hurt her feelings. Now I didn’t care whose feeling I hurt. As I said, I wasn’t the same person. I wasn’t happy anymore. I honestly didn’t think I would ever be happy again. What was the use of being happy when everything there was to be happy about was in the ground in forks and I wouldn’t be anymore. I was leaving happiness behind me and I wasn’t picking it back up. I would always be the angry shell of the once happy Nessie.
I just left her in my room with that little pout on her face. I had chosen not to speak anymore. I would only use my power. I decided this last night while I stared at my ceiling. I was done being what they all wanted me to be.
I walked out into the living room and just looked at everyone. I didn’t smile and I just thought. Dad, how do I get to where we are going? He looked at me like ‘why didn’t you just say that out loud‘. My mom didn’t know what to do. I just sat there and waited.
He didn’t answer me so I walked over to my mom and replayed what I had asked dad, I used my gift this time. She looked at my dad then she looked at me. She picked up a piece of paper wrote the directions on it and then handed it to me. I took it, grabbing my purse and my keys, then got in my new car that I had never even looked at let alone drove, pulled out and left my favorite place in the world.
When I was near the place were Jake was left I whispered to him. “I love you my Jakey. Say goodbye to your Nessie. She doesn’t exist anymore, they took her away when they put you were you are and they made me leave you. But she still loves you and she always will. Goodbye my love, my life, my world, and my best friend. It’s all over for your Nessie now. I’m just Renessmee Cullen from now on.”
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