I know the last
chapter wasn't very long, this one is a bit longer though. It is sad and
needs a tissue alert again. You all know I love angst and I must say I
knew from the very first day that this was what was going to happen. I
hope you all enjoy. Thanks so much to all the faithful readers of this
story and thanks to my beta as well!
Chapter 15: Unfair (Bella's POV)
He
was my best friend…He was my friend and I was sitting here at his
funeral while the fire tones rang out through all the firefighters
pagers surrounding me. I missed my friend. Looking straight ahead at his
casket, I felt someone take my hand. I knew who it is, but I didn't
even respond. I can't look away from Jake's casket.
As two tears
slid down my cheeks, I hurried up to wipe them away and made a silent
plea for God to spare me from having to go to another funeral for at
least a few years. I couldn't take this shit anymore; I had buried way
too many people that I loved, first my mom, my dad and now my best
friend. I thought God was punishing me for something, but I had no idea
what I'd done to deserve any of that.
God, seriously… what did I do to lose everyone I love?
Sobs
from a girl standing behind me took me out of my silent pleas with God.
As the Chief said his last words and the casket slowly made its way
into the ground, I felt Edward's hand on my back.
"Bella, it's
time to go, love." He said, looking at me. Standing up, I finally got a
look at the girl sobbing in the back row. She was wearing a sleek black
dress and crying hard against Harry's shoulder.
Walking past her, I
overheard something that just about killed me inside and made me
realize I hadn't talked to my "best friend" in several months.
"I
loved him, Harry. I didn't even get to tell him about her," I watched as
she placed her hand on her stomach rubbing it affectionately. "What am I
going to do now? She will never know her daddy."
Telling Edward I would meet him at the car, I made my way over to her.
"Excuse me, did you say 'she will never know her daddy'?" I asked her. I knew what she meant, I just wasn't sure I believed her.
"Um,
yeah, I did. I'm Kiara, Jake's girlfriend" and rubbing her belly again,
she added, "this is his little girl. Well, at least I think it's a
girl." She tried to smile, but it faded quickly. "Who are you?"
"Oh, I'm Bella, Jake's friend."
"Hi, Bella. He talked about you all the time. I feel like I already know you. It's nice to finally meet you in person."
"Hi,
Kiara. It's nice to meet you, too. I know this really isn't the place
to say this, but Jake was my best friend since we were little kids. If
you ever need anything, just let me know. "
She smiled again and leaned in for a hug.
"Thanks, Bella."
"Anytime."
I
smiled back and told my goodbyes, taking one last look over where Jake
had been laid to rest, then turned around to walk back up to my love.
Looking
out the window, I tried to remember the last time I had talked to Jake
and I couldn't. I would give anything to talk to him now and see him
with his baby one day, but he wouldn't get that chance.
I felt
Edward park the car, heard him get out and come around to open my door. I
hadn't really looked at him in a few days. I couldn't bring myself to
look at him. I was numb to everything around me, including him. Walking
into my house, I sat my stuff on the kitchen table and went straight to
my room to lie down. He didn't follow me. He knew I needed space. I was
so tired, but once my head hit the pillow, I couldn't even close my
eyes.
The tears finally broke through and I sobbed loudly. I
hadn't cried at all since the fire, since the night when I could have
lost my love, but lost my best friend instead. I didn't know how to take
any of this, I was fighting against all the feelings, but once they
broke through, there was no stopping them.
He must have heard me
from the living room because he was at my side within seconds, holding
me and trying to soothe me. It wasn't working, through. Nothing could
work now.
"Love, Bella… it's okay to cry. It's going to be okay. I
know you miss him; he was your best friend. Let it all out, Bells."
Once he called me that, the flood came even stronger. Bells…
"Jake.
I want my friend. It's not fair, Edward. It's not fair, he's gone and
I'm here and you're here, but you wouldn't be if it wasn't for him. IT'S
JUST NOT FUCKING FAIR." I screamed.
~*~*~*~*~
So what did you all think? I
know its sad, the end is coming very soon. I have decided though to show
the inside of Jake's and Kiara's life a bit more in some one shots that
will be posted as soon as Chasing Fire is over. Thanks for reading,
don't forget to let me know what you think
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