Chapter 12 – Set Fire to the Rain (Bella's POV)
There
he was staring at me, like I was all he could see in this huge crowd of
people. All I wanted was a glimpse of him, just a peek at what I could
have had. The whole time I was standing there I had been watching for
her to be on the sidelines like me watching for him, waving and smiling
as he walked by. But, instead all I ended up seeing was him staring
right at me.
Those eyes staring had emotions in them that I wasn't
ready to see and I chickened out and made a run for it. Something I was
good at by now.
He started walking toward me, I could feel his
eyes still on me, but I kept moving around all the people. Even pushing
my way through, I couldn't let him get to me. I had to make it to my
car. Keep going, Bella! I chanted over and over in my head. Till one
hand on my shoulder, a hand I knew so well even now after all this time
stopped me in my tracks.
"Bella, wait." He whispered.
Taking
a shuddering breath as he spoke my name, all I could do to answer him
was to shake my head no. I needed away from him; he was a drug to me. He
was a different kind of drug, yes, but a drug none the less. He was one
that saved my life. He was dangerous to me, he would never hurt me
physically but he could crumble me to pieces with one word.
I
couldn't let him play games with my heart anymore; all I had wanted was a
glimpse of him, now I had him right behind me. Speaking my name…
whispering in that voice that made me shudder every time I heard it.
"I
can't, Edward." I whispered back to him, shrugging away from his grasp,
still keeping my back toward him. I knew it would only take me looking
into his eyes once more and I would collapse and give in to the need I
felt deep inside myself.
The words that came from his direction
next startled me as much as the thunder sounding in the sky. As I jumped
at the sounds, Edward had me in his arms in seconds.
"I need you Bella. I love you Bella!"
Those
little words, was all I could take, I was done for. He loved me? I
didn't understand what he was talking about, but I couldn't help but
relax into him. As I stood there up against his chest, I let my mind
wonder to what it would be like to be with him. Just the two of us able
to be with each other, no one coming in between us. But of course, that
one tiny thought brought her back into my mind and I whipped around
staring into his eyes, with a fierceness even he could see.
Another
sound of thunder called out to the lighting as it cracked across the
sky. As the first droplets of rain fell down upon us, I asked the one
question I had to know.
"But, Edward how can you love me when you
are with someone else? That isn't fair of you to say that to me to, to
flaunt that in my face and then rip it out from under me." I stood there
my anger blazing inside me mixed with being hurt and love all at the
same time. "I can't let you hurt me again." I whispered backing away
from him slowly trying my hardest not to let those trader tears slip
down my cheeks. But it was a losing battle; they started their slow
trail down my cheeks before I could get away from him.
"Bella stop running and let me answer your questions, please."
Taking a deep, deep breath and closing my eyes I nodded for him to continue.
"Bella
that girl you saw, the one in the grocery store, that was Lindz and she
showed up out of the blue. To answer your big question and to wipe away
a little bit of that hurt, I was never with her after you left. All I
could think of was you. I'm not the same person I was before you and I
told Lindz that. She saw that I loved you that day, and before that day I
really didn't think you felt that way about me. I was stupid; I thought
you could never love
Standing there staring at
him, I couldn't help the feelings that were boiling over. I wanted to
believe him, to believe that he loved me. Could I trust him? I had no
clue what to do as I stood there and the rain started to fall in
torrential drops on my head and falling down my face temporarily
blinding me. But it didn't matter; I wanted what he was offering me. I
wanted to trust him.
Closing my eyes and shaking my head slightly
trying to shake away the doubt I had clouding my thoughts of happiness, I
opened my eyes and looked up and as soon as my eyes meet his he was
standing right there in front of me. His lips crashed down on mine and I
melted into his embrace. I latched onto him ablaze of sheer joy and
passion swept over me as he scooped me up into his arms, kissing me
harder than I had ever been kissed before.
His mouth left my lips
but he didn't stop kissing me, his lips never left my skin as he kissed
my neck and up to my ears, then he whispered those words again.
"I love you Bella, let me be your one and only."
I
had only come to the parade to get a glimpse of him and now I had his
mouth all over me setting my skin on fire with every press of his lips
against me. I didn't have to worry about all the other stuff right now,
all I could think of was I was in his arms. I had that missing piece of
me right here, that missing piece of my life that I had lost and longed
to have back. I had it right here and I wasn't about to let it go. He
wants to be my one and only, I could handle that. I could be his and he
could be mine. I might actually get to be happy again.
Yeah we had a long road ahead of us and a lot of tough decisions to make, but if we were together we might actually make it.
"Bella," He whispered into my hair "What is going through that pretty little head of yours?"
"Nothing
really, just thinking of what it would mean to be your one and only.
And thinking about how happy I am right this very minute, something I
haven't felt in a while. I feel complete again."
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